June has been my month to get lots of time with my girl. Miles has been playing with friends and heading off to various summer camp programs in the morning. So there has been lots of time for me to spend with Jocelyn one on one. My brain is trying to wrap itself around the fact that in ONE MONTH she will be ONE YEAR OLD. I’m still the woman walking around telling people, “I just had a baby.” Yea, if “just” means almost a year ago. It’s crazy. To me she’s still two months old. Lord, slow this runaway train down!

So this month, as I look forward a month to my baby girl being a year, I take a look at “us” a year ago, and now. So here we are, that little mystery baby that I never dreamed would actually be a girl in my belly and us now. Wild.

So if you can’t tell, she’s my little punkin dolly. My heart is bursting as I look ahead at her birthday.

By the way, remember how I said Jocelyn is two months in my head? Yea, well, I need to realize this girl is a TODDLER now. She’s running, kicking balls, playing with all sorts of toys, playing with doggies, busy, busy, busy, dancing and shattering ipads. Yes, I was the moron who left the ipad on the couch where she could pick it up and carry it to the tile floor to smash it. Jocelyn and I are already costing daddy an arm and a leg with our shenanigans. So note to self, this girl is a full on little human being capable of destruction, no matter how adorable and jovial she is! Watch out!

Truth be told, this isn’t a true self portrait. I chose the settings and had our good friend Chris snap some pics of us for fun while hanging out today. Of course, my husband was the one taking the studio maternity shot of me last summer. Funny thing, if you look around the area in the photo where Jocelyn and I are holding hands, you can see Miles’ foot in the background. Miles has been doing great lately. This past winter was a big struggle for me to relate to him but things are becoming more clear now as we relax into the summer. More on that later, but it’s good stuff. My kids are growing up much too fast and my mind and heart are trying to keep up with all the changes I need to keep making in order to keep rolling with whatever comes next.

PS That green dress is a 2008 Matilda Jane dress and has long been a favorite of mine. Lately I’ve been unearthing lots of oldies from the back of my closet and so thankful they are still hanging in there for me. The only Matilda Jane Joss is wearing is her headband. She’s still working on growing into most of the MJC I have for her.